A green Jewel of Juul's, created in a secret alien hybrid laboratory in the unity mindfield, King Tubby is bulging at the seams with bulbous exintraterrestrial lizard DNA. Here to infect the matrix with chlorophyllic, heart math viri and send bass drop ripples across the land. King Tubby is coiled up to spring like a jolly green sumo, destined to thrive and proliferate through the agency of Cactus nerdensis. The King is on a mission to spread his beautiful blocky, pentagonal code of conscious matter into an army of seedlings with marching orders to touch hearts and minds.

King Tubby is a Cross between A friend’s Scopulicola known as MA #9 (Mark Albert’s #9) and Juul’s Giant. The cross was made In Ukiah California by Mark and mutual friend Will Tomlinson of Oakland Cactus Co. When it was just about an inch tall I noticed it in the flats as standing out from the rest of the cactus in terms of shape. The top was flat and the juvenile cactus had fairly flat sides and just looked different. I kept noticing it and pulled it early to pot up into a larger pot. It continued to be impressive and show promise. I took pictures of it from very small and at other stages because I was fairly convinced it was going to show a really nice morphology. I noticed the fat character of the seedling with the flatish sides. I was listening to a lot of famoust dub artist King Tubby at the time and the name just popped into my head, so I wrote it on the tag.

Young King Tubby

King Tubby can throw some real bombers sometimes. It only they all looked like this. But is also throws more ribby growth at times. I think established plants will tend to throw fatter growth, but I don’t have any very mature plants yet.

Showing how flat the sides are.

Stress blister from being scraped against spines. That can be avoided, but sometimes it happens from even gentle handling or harvesting cuts.

Already labelled at just a couple inches tall.

King Tubby really looks like what it is, a cross between a Scopulicola and a Pachanoi. It has some of the seagull-like indentations of which are more prominent on Pachanoi and often absent on Scopulicola. Overall the appearance is maybe more scop-like, juicy, smooth and small spined, but again with some pach-like characteristics. We all have speculated that MA #9 may actually be a hybrid as well, but who really knows. Being a hybrid, it may be of much more ethnopharmacological interest than typical Scopulicolas. The color is very much like its scop parent, pale green, sometimes yellowing in the sun or in cold weather.

It is not named tubby because it is a large cactus like MA #9, but more for the plump flat sided morphology. The size is more small to medium Pachanoi. The flat sided morphology, which I often refer to as “blocky” is sometimes very prominent and sometimes not. It tends more toward blockiness when it grows as five ribbed which is mostly does. I don’t think I have ever seen it grow as 7 ribbed, though it occasionally throws a 4 sided pup. The much greater majority of columns have 5 ribs, a trait I’m constantly on the lookout for.

Fat ‘n’ Flat. This would be the ideal growth to me for this cactus, super blocky even just below the growing tip.

Although it can be super fat sometimes, I have never seen it crack yet from overwatering, even growing outside, where a super blocky seedling, Gordita, blew up and cracked in the winter rains in the same conditions. It doesn’t seem particularly prone to fungal rust in damp conditions so far, though I’ve seen some. The biggest downside I’ve encountered is it is prone to what some call stress blisters, black blister that seeps black goo and scars the cactus. This can be in response to rough handling and wounds, such as when it is scraped by thorns from a neighboring column. I have sen it seem to happen spontaneously as well though. For handling, this can be a problem and newly harvested columns should be treated gingerly. I’ve also seen it when the column is bent, as it trying to stake up a leaning column. This could be a major drawback if taking, handling and storing a large number of cuts. It often happens when on the cuts after they are harvested.

So fat Mr. Rogers tried to put it on his foot.

The first cuts are being distributed as of 2025 via auctions. Other than those, I’ve only given a few to friends and in a couple of trades. I’m happy to get this gorgeous cactus out into the world, may he thrive. As my friend says, Long live the king!

King Tubby throws the occasional 4 sided pup, but they usually shift to 4 or 5 ribbed pretty fast.

Sprouting from a small riblet. This may be the future of mass propagation. See this page for how to…

I know, but stop dry humping your computer screen.

Yup, King Tubby even has his own branding

I grow and test out a lot of cactus. King Tubby is like a scop with benefits. The King will be Usurped someday and that is as it should be. But all traits considered, tangible and intangible, King Tubby at this point is what I could see planting in large quantity. King Tubby is blocky, Usually 5 sided, friendly enough to handle easily without gloves, pretty and just pretty slammin’. The most troubling thing is proneness to stress blisters. The other failing is inconsistent blockiness, which I hope will improve on established plants in the ground under favorable growing conditions. I have clones that are blockier, but they may be lacking in some other areas. As soon as I can get him to throw some flowers, I’ll be sowing his blocky genes far and wide, mostly with other blocky-leaning cacti. Look for seeds in the near future, hopefully 2026. Fingers crossed…